200 Most Popular Shower Thoughts That Turns Your Head

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Some of the best thoughts in history have forged their way during the shower and they have coined a term for that, shower thoughts. A shower is a special place for most, a place where you can disconnect with the noise of the world and completely connect with the inner you. It’s a place where you are not bound to think within the society made rules and you can be creative and weird on your own. Here is a list of some of the craziest shower thoughts of all time. Prepare yourself for the craziness of a lifetime!

shower thoughts

  1. Drinking is fine, it’s like borrowing happiness from life.
  2. Clapping is literally hitting yourself for showing your support to someone else.
  3. Bill Clinton and Hillary Clinton missed making history and if Hillary had won then it would have been the very first time when two presidents have had awesome sex with each other before.
  4. If I can pretend to be asleep, I might as well fall asleep.
  5. In 2060, Kids will be reading about “Awesome me” rather than some ugly war women in Nagasaki.
  6. Have I ever heard about a perfectly executed murder?
  7. Being a celebrity sucks, some ugly women from Canada can comment on your beautiful dress and you don’t even know her.
  8. In my lifetime, the last death I will witness is mine.
  9. I wonder why is Jesus white?, racism existed since the foundation of time.
  10. A human submarine is a pregnant women swimming in the pacific.
  11. Human babies cry after they are born, they must have enjoyed their time inside their mom’s.
  12. If I do my PHD, every appointment they want from me is a Doctor’s appointment.
  13. Titanic sinking must have been a wild feast for the fellow sharks, I guess.
  14. Mars must be populated now with all the robot shit NASA leaves there.
  15. An Eagle is a symbol of Freedom in the United States, still there are Eagles in the zoo. What the hell is wrong with this world?
  16. I wonder how many men have I met already during my lifetime.
  17. If Bill Gates gives me 0.001% of his wealth, I will be very rich and his wealth will alomst be untouched.
  18. You wear special clothes called the jogging clothes to tell everyone that you are running just for fun and there is no problem with you. Crazy!
  19. If we all could fly, the taxi business would be over. Lucky them!
  20. They say that their house is on fire but it’s the fire that’s actually on the house.
  21. Scooby-Doo proved that at last every evil is a human.
  22. The letter A makes 50% of Canada.
  23. The Japanese flag is weird, I mean a pie chart over a white background.
  24. If chicken is not “Bird chicken”, beef is not “beef mammal” then why the hell a fish is a “Tuna Fish”.
  25. My stomach must be thinking that all the potatoes are mashed potatoes.
  26. When I dig a pit, that could be the first time soil inside the pit have ever seen the sun.
  27. Those boring history classes will only get tougher and harder as the time rolls on.
  28. There were Mammoths alive when people were building the Pyramids.
  29. My dog understands when I say ask him to come closer. I don’t understand anything about his language, does that make my doggy smarter than me?
  30. I believe, half the things I read on newspaper these days are not true at all.
  31. Batman’s superpower is his wealth and none of the billionaires around the world even tried wearing the mask for once.
  32. Would I even kiss my wife early morning? I might never, every mouth stinks in the morning.
  33. I waste the first 15 minutes of my day wanting not to leave my bed for that extreme pee.
  34. There is multi player game mode, they should also make a multi dream mode, many people dreaming together.
  35. Matt Damon was paid 15 times more to pretend to go to the mars than actual astronauts will ever get.
  36. If I win the lottery, I might as well buy the office and kick my boss out of the window.
  37. Sometimes I wish I could go back to my childhood and correct every shit in a sequence.
  38. Somewhere out there in the world, there’s a child whose father works at Nintendo and nobody believes him.
  39. Depression and Carbon Monoxide are the same, both kill slowly.
  40. Before ‘was’, was is ‘is’.
  41. I should have a task manager for my brain.
  42.  A person comes out of a person because another person came inside that person.
  43. If my Laptop overheats, will it explode or freeze?
  44. Before the camera, what did they do in their picnics?
  45. If I yawn, my eyes water…may be I miss my bed and that’s really sad.
  46. When someone is mad, kick them..now run or get killed.
  47. All the beautiful smiles are fake smiles, uglier the smile and more genuine it looks.
  48. I wonder where the hell in my life will I use a derivative of sine.
  49. No matter how far, any distance is a walking distance if the purse is empty.
  50. Vampire and Zombie bit each other, now are they both vampires or both Zombies?
  51. Have I ever bought milk from the same cow twice?
  52. Water is a beverage but it’s taste depends on it’s temperature.
  53. We water plants to let them grow and when they grow we betray them.
  54. I don’t like to be lazy but I am too lazy to do something about it.
  55. What the hell would I be doing right now, if superman was the bad guy?
  56. Cucumber and human both have 70% water. Are we from the same ancestors?
  57. If it does not kill me, will it make me stronger?
  58. If I have no plan than practically everything will go according to plan.
  59. I am tired running from my problems.
  60. Colour Grey and Color Gray represent same thing but are from different countries.
  61. My home smells the best out of any I have ever been in.
  62. The greatest love stories in the world are based on lies and deceits.
  63. I am dying…after 95 years.
  64. Sex toys are alive in toy stories?
  65. I think drones are the kites of 2018.
  66. Does anyone really know how it smells inside water?
  67. My emotions are so high, I wonder if someone ever have heard it?
  68. We are all extremely developed form of primitive bacteria.
  69. When I blow my nose with a toilet paper, it’s a major favor to the paper.
  70. My dog is too loyal, I think I don’t deserve so much.
  71. Why the hell can’t I blow my ears the way I blow my nose?
  72. Sometimes I hear voices in my head singing and I must admit, they are too damn melodious.
  73. I think after few years, there will no camels from the 20th century.
  74. I think most men will give better hand jobs than most women do.
  75. Have I ever drank the milk and ate the beef from the same cow?
  76. Tagging on my Facebook wall is a serious offense, I might as well take some action.
  77. When I was a child, I never knew about racism or hating others, now I know and think school played a pretty big role in that.
  78. If all men are dogs, why women do not marry dogs directly?
  79. They say all men are dogs, I wonder what does that make the women.
  80. If bible was never written, there would have been no Jesus.
  81. Do I really take showers just to think?
  82. If I take those slogans for saving water seriously, I could never shower as well.
  83. What does not kill me will definitely make me strong.
  84. There are million things out there which I can see but cannot touch, my girlfriend being one.
  85. Girls usually tend to love party animals.
  86. Am I my parent’s favorite child?
  87. Who might be the ugliest girl in the world?
  88. All bad guys cover their lower face, and guys like Batman cover their upper part.
  89. CPR is like hitting your television until it works, but this time for humans.
  90. Apocalypse movies always tend to show how a news reporter is committed to his work even though the world around him is falling apart.
  91. If you buy a lottery ticket just to make quick bucks, this proves that you have been a loser whole your life.
  92. It’s strange when they say computers were invented to save our time.
  93. Sometimes I have mental conversation with myself for hours, am I crazy?
  94. Bomb squad guys must probably find it difficult scratching their balls in those weird thick jackets.
  95. Paying taxes is literally paying penalty for being too successful.
  96. Being intelligent isn’t enough, Artificial Intelligence also should find a way to be utterly stupid like us.
  97. Big boobs are like the sun, if you are wearing black shades then you can watch them longer.
  98.  Teacher who says high schools are the best part of lives must have had a fucked up lifestyle.
  99. It’s weird when they ask me about my hobbies and I can’t remember one.
  100. Turning the volume high is zooming but for the sound this time.
  101. Almost every hand I have shaken till now must have touched some seriously ugly stuff.
  102. It’s weird when I fail to trust a single word from the newspaper.
  103. If I live for the next 50 years, I might become the coolest grand dad ever.
  104. I can reply to an insult in seconds but find hard to reply a compliment.
  105. Why the hell do they call a soccer ball, Football?
  106. If you are clumsy and stupid enough, every stair is the stairway to heaven.
  107. College hostel is the place where almost every boy lighted his first cigarette.
  108. If you favorite celebrity ever visits you on a hospital, that means your time is up.
  109. Rain makes sound is a weird analogy, it’s quite until it hits something.
  110. Rap battle is just verbally raping the guy against you.
  111. Almost everything is a difficult puzzle if you are stupid enough.
  112. Plants are way evolved than we humans, those things literally eat sunlight and make food.
  113. Most of Shakespeare book titles are the name of those who are dead at the end.
  114. This is a crazy world, I have to prove a machine that I am not actually a machine.
  115. Some characters die in the TV because the producer wants to fire them.
  116. Santa knows the address of every dirty girl in the town.
  117. Without shocks, our feet are naked.
  118. Books are nothing but someone else’s imagination that cost money.
  119. Sending kids to Kinder Garden is simply paying some dudes a lot of money for teaching your child nothing.
  120. Kangaroos must be the dwarf versions of Dinosaur.
  121. Buying an airline ticket is like paying for anything that might happen during the flight.
  122. Actors are paid millions to fake live other lives than theirs.
  123. If I go to a coma, will I still be a chain smoker after I wake up.
  124. The first person to ever hear a parrot speak must have had a heart attack.
  125. Books are being replaced by tablets and phones, that sums it up as far as human evolution is concerned.
  126. The toughest part of depression is acting like you are just fine.
  127. What the hell is the difference between a dove and a pigeon?
  128. It’s weird when nobody recognizes you in a party.
  129. Atomic bomb was invented earlier than computers, this is freaking crazy.
  130. A sex dream is simply your brain doing overtime.
  131. I have never seen anyone in an empty room?
  132. Russia is bigger than Pluto. Who measures this things?
  133. I hate the cats with a lot of fur on them.
  134. Every Pope I have ever seen is old, is it a necessary trait to become a pope?
  135. C or S? What is actually silent in the word” Scent”?
  136. When I was a child, I was too damn cute.
  137. After Apple, who would ever dare to name a company after fruits?
  138. The real difference between being rich and being a playboy is a lot of quality time spent with girls.
  139. If I focus on something extensively, will it hurt my brain?
  140. Formula One racers are the most luckiest guys in the world. They are paid millions just to drive some really cool cars.
  141. My girlfriend smells incredible.
  142. Every man cries over the dead body of an onion
  143. James Bond is the most popular Spy and this is why he is also the worst spy. He was supposed to protect his identity, was not he ?
  144.  I have out grown my clothes.
  145. If human race goes extinct, who would visit the Disneyland?
  146. If a teacher retires at 70, that means the guy just wasted 90% of his life at school, from age 6 to 70.
  147. What might be my first word if I happen to wake up besides Jennifer?
  148. Karma is a bitch to those who deserve it.
  149. I really would love it if I could meet the teenage version of my father.
  150. The difference between Sanity and Insanity is simply In.
  151. Is there a Parallel Universe or is this science shit just fucking around?
  152. Nobody knows the best liar.
  153. Sleeping is an art and I am good at it.
  154. It’s better not to have a routine at all than to have it and not follow it.
  155. It’s better to not have a plan B because it sure as hell means that Plan A will fail.
  156. If Chess was a team sports, I would still hate it.
  157. I wonder how many of my friends have a soft spot for my sister.
  158. If all the trees stop breathing, that would be the end of all.
  159. Sleeping naked is the best feeling ever.
  160. My father looks like me and I am 20 while he is 50.
  161. Alcohol is not the answer, but it helps us forget the real question.
  162. Fire Trucks have water in them and still people call them Fire Trucks.
  163. Omelets and Fried Chicken are both the same, only different stages in a Chickens life.
  164. I have my own writing font, that makes me unique.
  165. I don’t remember the first time I saw my dog.
  166. Carrot juice is the same as orange juice.
  167. Let us all take a moment to appreciate the fantastic work our body has been doing all these years.
  168. Who coined the term,”kill the time” was an absolute illiterate.
  169. You are the safest while you are asleep.
  170. Those old company owners who complain about youth not working hard should be hanged because they are the one who do not give the work at the first place.
  171. There are two official sizes for rappers, Big and Lil.
  172. If I had wings, I would still sleep all day long. I am super lazy.
  173. Sleeping is lazy. I wonder what going to bed early makes it?
  174. People love to hear old songs because nobody hears shitty ones.
  175. I don’t trust people I meet on the internet.
  176. Port Sites are some of the most visited websites in the world.
  177. If there was no internet, half the couple today would have been single till this day.
  178. Being consistently inconsistent is what makes you inconsistent.
  179. Every girl in my life seems ugly at times.
  180. I think roses are fruits, only prettier.
  181. All the girls I know are obsessed with food.
  182. Assassination and murder are the same, the only difference between them is popularity of the dead.
  183. These days people remake movies, music videos and games but nobody remakes a book because everyone knows the outcome that will follow.
  184. If these were no laws, there would be no crimes.
  185. A great faker is a great actor.
  186. Two knives working together for a common purpose are called scissors.
  187. Magic is magic because it’s not real..if it was real, it would not have been magic.
  188. Has anyone in the history of the world ever escaped death?
  189. Rich people coined the sentence,”Money does not make one happy” just to convince the poor guys not to get rich at all.
  190. Whenever I become egoistic about my looks, my front camera keeps my feet on the ground.
  191. Dog food is for dogs and everyone who has ever tasted it knows why.
  192. “Date” is a more polite word for “Sex interview”.
  193. Spacesuits are useless in ever space accident that might occur.
  194. Dying virgin is the worst case scenario of them all.
  195. Attractive people are not so polite but ugly people are definitely rude.
  196. If people hired me for killing times, I would have been the greatest assassin of all time.
  197. A fart is literally the gas version of food we eat but this time with a terrible smell.
  198. Walking on water is no big deal when the temperature is low enough.
  199. If humans could fly, Uber would go bankrupt.
  200. I wonder if I would ever have a son as cool as me.
  201. 10 to 12 people is the actual size for “tons of people” in most cases .
  202. How do snakes have sex, they are literally noodles like thing?
  203. Sex and Skydiving can change the world population by 1 and both are dangerous which makes them very similar in that sense.

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